SKITS FEB

140202
AMERICA is not the greatest country in the world, indeed.
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"first step to solving a problem is recognizing there is one."

ANH: I'mma break you into stunt racing and horror games!
KY: Omggggg !!! I wanna!!! How do i play? I might get addicted. :/
ANH: they always are!  I'll make sure not to keep you past midnight or you'll turn into a pumpkin.
KY: Hahsha!

my SAMSUNG NX300 mirrorless DSLR-equivalent with CMOS sensor has finally arrived! you uglies are no longer SAFE!
ANH: HAHA HASHTAG! you just laughed in Arabic.

FEM: you need a case for your phone.
ANH: that IS the case!
FEM: haa it matches the phone so well!
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CASEOLOGY cases made in Korea, peaches!

140208
I randomly take shots of cough syrup just cuz i like the taste.

140209
MOM really enjoyed X-MEN First Class. now, I'mma show her all 3 sequels!

140210
MOM: your friends looks quite young. how old is she?
ANH: I dunno...

140211
flu symptoms coming back. time to wear my red SUPERMAN panties and fight it off. HWAITING!

ironic how those with trust issues cannot be trusted themselves.

this one guy I know who's under 4'10" said he worked at Disneyland, so I assumed he was one of those characters... my mistake.

never work for free. know what you're worth.

cut out all the flakes in your life. they think their time is more precious than yours.

suit up like an Eskimo and set cough drops on your desk; managers will most likely leave you alone.

I just realized, wow, this girl is a BABY!

smashing pumpkins - 1979

140212
NX300
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no shoulder straps, no flash, no mirrors needed. uglies wanted.

a party is not a party till someone gets NAKED! haa watch PROJECT X, peaches. hilarious!

colleague: yes, personality wise, she's nice, but work wise...
ANH: haa I don't get how people do that. I'm the same exact person. even when I'm sober, people think I'm drunk.

I Want Romance 2
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she started eating fried chicken after getting drunk.... she's vegetarian. BAHAHAA

140213
CHOEZOM: :) i like the songs you post on ur wall!!
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aww I should be a music producer, I tell ya!

wait, Valentine's Day? which one should I let go?!

"she's so high above me like Cleopatra, Joanne of Arc, or Aphrodite... she's so lovely"

ANH: is this okay? does this dress make me look fat?
GALPAL: yes, it does! haa

ANH: Valentine's should be any day.
TIM: Ya that's why I ain't getting my girl SH*T!
ANH: BAHAHAA yes, you show her who wears the skirt!
TIM: :(

140214
you cannot just drink water at INCHEONWON!

140216
APPLE: our products cost twice as much and are twice as slow.
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yesterday's technology... today!
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BAHAHAA

140217
dare I say, TENA is a JOY to have?

"take your time with any project since getting them done fast goes unnoticed."

ANH: my friend could stand at an intersection and peeps would think he's begging for money.
SUNNY: haa happened to my friend when he wore a beanie. they tried to give him money while he was sitting outside somewhere.

this one gay waiter was only talking to me for a good 15 min. my ex hated it. it's like she's not even there. haa sad!

my gaydar is unreliable. I just assume some guys are that friendly! haa

ANH: haa you were cursing away playing DRIVER San Francisco you, LA driver!
KY: Hahahah!!! Dang, ive never seen that side of me before!! This is why i dont play games on a daily basis ! Lol I turn into the HULK!

140218
SCOTT: I watch my Korean series on my iPhone, iPad, iLaptop, iBiased LOL
JESS: I'm watching SCANDAL on my Samsung Note 3 with its 5.7" screen and 1920x1080 resolution.
DON: whoa, your phone screen is bigger than my TV.
JESS: iWIN.
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Brian: haa iPhone SUCKS!

"a technologically incapable man is either ancient or not a man."

haa I cannot pressure myself to hold grudges! I'm treating my PMS-induced colleague to Rice Krispies TREATS double chocolatey chunk!

140219
omifrakkingod... you peaches are WAY too Chinese for me!

sorry, LA people are not as diverse as I thought. Asians only hanging with Asians! it's harmless to mix colors for fcuksake! whaddaheo?!

140220
this one colleague tried drinking MONSTER, and he was bouncing off the walls. haa amateur, caffeine does not work!

140222
I refrain from asking friends what they do; not at all interested. your financial status does not determine your value as a person.

140224
"fiancee" is one French word I don't care for. mofos shamelessly throwing it around like we give a damn. I prefer "croissant"... and INCHEONWON!

I seriously cannot hang out with vegetarians; humans are not meant to eat grass all the time.

I swyped BAHAHAA and BAGHDAD came out.

I swyped "Don" and "Dork" came out.

"I hate you, ugly."
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flip that upside down and you'll know what I mean.

would a woman still do it with you if she didn't have any more feelings?

140225
they seriously need to make macarons JUMBO-sized, sell them in BULK, and deliver them in CRATES! I just don't have that French appetite, it's KOREAN!

I don't care to get anyone in trouble at work. what you do at your desk is your business... unless I'm your supervisor. BAHAHAA

FRIEND: what is your sister's type?
ANH: not you.

can you frakkin' stop using fancy words? English is my third language!

fem colleague: my photographer sent my photos to Penthouse.
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haa whaaat? can I see them?!

ANH: yeah, keep laughing. I'mma kidnap you... kid.
TENA: I deserve it.... I talk to strangers... Lol
ANH: haa you should stop doing that. I'mma lure you with a yogurt soju truck. you would be found tied up and gagged inside.
TENA: Yes.... But this time, I'm drunk, not killed. Hahaha
ANH: haa yes, I rather have you drunk than killed... again.

there's this unmistakable joie-de-vivre about TENA. LIKE

"you're the only song I want to hear. melodies softly soaring through my atmosphere."
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Death Cab for Cutie

I only think of you on two occasions...

MOM: why are you drinking so much?
ANH: cuz I miss JOY... and KITTY! mmm boobs...

140226
YES! men and women can absolutely be friends! you jealous freaks should really work on your low self-esteem. NOYIN'!

FEM: are you a player?
ANH: no, I'm not.
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then she molested me! haa I prefer to date before I get there! whatta?

last boss: can you make it whiter than white?
ANH: a raise is supposed to go upwards, not downwards.
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haa clueless managers asking for the/
Jeff: UNPOSSIBLE!

don't take it personally when you are lied to by colleagues; they're just following orders. unless they're blatantly trying to get you in hot water, that's when you strike back!

Facebook isn't the same without Jeff Poh (kandyman). I might have to deactivate.

waiter, there's a camera in my soup!
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apparently, zoomed in too closely.

INCHEONWON should be called CHADOLBAEGI.
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Jeff: haa Korean for BRISKETS!

ANH: she's under the misconception that women don't need men.
CHRIS: that's what happens when they're independent!
ANH: you mean lesbians?

fem colleague: I don't mind a little lipstick.
ANH: ooh, so you're bisexual?
fem colleague: haa nooo! I enjoy my strudels.

applying for another job even though I'm keeping this one. HWAITING!

my commute home with heavy traffic. 9 agonizing minutes. BAHAHAA ROFLCOPTER!

how about those peeps who day goodnight to you, yet you can still see them active online?

the rain is music to my ears, but I have to sleep with earplugs on since my nephew plays his piano so early in the morning! damn them Asian kids!

140227
wanna delete this one fool, but I'm still cool with his other half. DILEMMAS!

TENA is one of the smartest charming girls i know. believe me, there aren't that many attractive girls with intelligence. she is well put together; almost perfect. a true gem.

I swyped GEM and got TENA.

I meet quality people when I'm not trying. I like both uglies. OTTOKE?! 

"je croix que c'est trop tard pour te dire que ca fait mal. mon coeur n'est pas comme avant car il s'en va tout doucement."
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Beatrice Martin

alright, I had to delete this one guy. his foodtography was horrid! why do they always look half eaten? WHY?!

meatheads are people too.
meatheads are people too.

140228
TENA: YES! gag me, strangle me, it's all good!
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jebus, she could've been a pornstar if she wasn't so smart. her sexual appetite is undeniable.

TENA: I'm pretty much horny all the time.

I'mma bound her with my camera strap; gag her with briskets; and take her away in my kogi truck. that ugly is asking for it.

140202

CRYSTAL: hey, you should get a case for your phone... that already has a case.

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haa it is that thin!

ROSA: no, really, tell me! what are cameltoes? do I have them? 

ANH: dunno, I have to check.

ROSA: what are fun bags?

quality peeps are scarce, and I'm fortunate to have spent time with some of the best last night. you know who you are!

received $50 from a red envelope at work. gave it to MOM!

people take me more seriously when I tell them, "you better show up next time or I'll delete Don!"

broken up couples throwing me curve balls! I hate you ALL! haa

I can be murderous when I'm blunt, but I do want to respect others' feelings.

ANH: BOO! did I scare you out of the flu? 

TENA: nope, but feeling better.

ANH: stay away from the cold... hottie.

140203

anyone know of any reliable OC auto glass shop for sunroof replacement under $500?

if it's that expensive to get a simple shattered sunroof replaced, I might as well start moding my car.

"if someone crosses your line about how much flakiness you'll tolerate, you can talk to them about it; cut them out of your life; or downgrade them." 

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succeedsocially.com

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ooh, I'm already doing those! liberating!

140205

snap at me just once, you'll immediately get downgraded. I treat everyone with respect, I expect the same in return. 

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I stopped mingling with my neighboring colleague altogether. keep your lousy relationship drama at home! misdirected anger is frowned upon.

working to the soundtrack of "Indiana Jones and the temple of doom"! BAHAHAA

LEGO has clever comedy writers... period

ORDER STATUS: attempted delivery.

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well, seems like my address isn't available on any GPS!140202

now, where's my superbowl of brisket sauce?!

google CHROME keeps losing my frakkin' tabs! OPERA is a much better browser, and 2x  faster than FIREFOX.

you same thing you do to me, i'mma do it to you.

how were you still dating her when everyone knows how demented she already is?

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i guess some guys are only after the sex, disregarding mental torture.

140203

ANH: KITTY could show ROSA a good time. and that kitten is practically a child! embarassing.

MIKE: KITTY has fun bags. hours of fun!

ANH: HOURS! some girls are so well built for sex. it's AMAZING! unlike rosa... or marie... or aaron.

MIKE: BAHAHAA

you can't tell when i'm joking, and i like it that way. not giving you the benefit of smileys! NEVERRR!

ANH: alright, i'll be shouting "PENIS!" in public as a signal for you to stop talking when your bluntness gets outta hand, alright?

ROSA: thanks for the clue. i'll keep that in mind for sure.

ANH: i got yo back, homie!

Don: WOOF!

140204

CONAN: hillary clinton is encouraging hispanic families to read to their kids... she's also telling asian families to ease up on the math so that the rest of us can catch up.

CONAN: so you can speak 3 languages? most of us in the united states can barely speak english.

you're confusing. too random! as long as you're not mental. i cannot do mentals... or those who are high 25/8.

health nuts drive me... NUTS! you may just get hit by a bus tomorrow. frakkin' EAT IT!

"COKE, your in america, so you speak american!"

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why do ignoranuses always sound so... dumb? please, like COKE is really gonna lose any sells.

i guess to some uneducated whiteys, anyone brown is a potential terrorist.

140205

when they say it'd still be fun with just you showing up, you know they love you that much!

TENA: so you wanna play RESIDENT EVIL 6?

ANH: yesss, squeamish girls make for the best partners!

TENA: haa

ANH: all that screaming makes the game more interactive!

TENA: but i scream; and pause; and throw the controller!

ANH: how can you ever beat that title?!

now, for the facebook lookback private chat links!

rapper EUNJI is leaving NINEMUSES?! fcuk NOOO!

i no speak americano... frappuccino... dicaprio... avocado... INCHEONWON!

my kpop girl band would be called SEOULM8Z

140206

if they must use my camera to shoot, i usually set it on AUTO so they don't fcuk it up. however, there's always that ONE person blinking at every take! WHY? HOW?!

too. much. POWER! fast phone, fast laptop, fast camera, shattered sunroof...

she never lets me pay for her. the self-reliant ones are the best!

140207

ANH: i just don't eat enough bacon; that must be sooo unamerican.

MIKE: not missing out. i live in texas where EVERYTHING is made of bacon! ugh...

140208

ANH: peeps don't change overnight, boob!

FEM: hmm, maybe she's changed now.

ANH: too much credit! haa perhaps she's gained another size.

FEM: haa perhaps.

ANH: i have to draw the line at DDDs. that's already beyond HD; it's HDDD!

JEFF: ROR melon HD!

ANH: jeff was a breastman till i introduced him to kpop LEGS!

140208

i'm still not hungry for lunch.

140209

i'm usually on time or too early. BAHAHAA

STEP 1 for meeting new people: do not stay home 25/8 like Don?.

X: don't invite filipinos. they come in packs of 10.

ANH: haa oh noooes! they tend to bring all of their relatives! same with inviting them to bonfires!

X: Yeah, filipino pot lucks might as well be banquets. 

ANH: BAHAHAA

X: If it wasn't for Filipinos, I would be a lot skinnier.

ANH: haa at least korean BBQs have plentiful veggie sides!

X: Yeah, if you see something green at a filipino dinner, it's just the color of the dish which is serving more meat.

ANH: this is GOLD!

X: "vegetarian" to filipino just means the animal they are eating doesn't eat meat.

KITTY: whaddaHEO?! even my DDDs won't take that much meat.

i applaud self-proclaimed hermits who push themselves to get out and meet new faces. the rest of you peaches, i won't even bother anymore. LAME!

ANH: most peeps lack trust.

X: But when someone is safe, walls are down in a jiffy.

ANH: haa my bedroom doors are always open!

X: Yeah, Don?'s doors are open too. I looked inside. A lot of fast food trash and action figures. 

ANH: his car is the same!

X: Yeah, his car is like a collection of boba and water cups.  Too many times he's made a left turn and I feel my butt getting wet. He hasn't gotten into any accidents, yet his insurance totaled his car.

140212

SUNNY: why are my eyes so small in this photo? i look asian.

ANH: haa you ARE asian!

"Charice's mother comes out as former lesbian"

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wait, what? you cannot just turn straight either! BAHAHAA whaddaHEO?

140213

"shown to increase blood pressure and levels of unhealthy cholesterol and triglycerides"

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too many of you people don't take it seriously enough. lay off the frakkin' SUGAR! good thing i don't have much of a sweet tooth.

GP BASIC - black bounce

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these SoKo fem rappers are sooo BADASS! raping this SONG!

i'mma burn a GP BASIC CD with ALL 12 tracks as "black bounce".

fem colleague: what did you say? BONNET? i didn't know that was a french word.

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wow, bet she doesn't know that CROISSANT is either. ignorant americans.

after randomly finding a photo of this woman (janey yu) working at MIT online, i felt compelled to shoot this email to her:

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stumbled upon your profile...

and i just had to tell you that i find you... beautiful.

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whatever happens, it'll still be a nice valentine's day confession for her.

140215

"all crimes, including murder, will be legal for 12 hours"

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great concept, first one was good, this one will exceed expectations.

140216

i'm a sucker for badass girly tomboys like JANEY and chloe moretz. 

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haa "girly tomboys"! contradiction! safer than lesbians.

BELIEVE (tv show)

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whoa, produced by JJ ABRAMS and co-starring JAMIE CHUNG?! I'M IN!

140219

GALPAL: you made me delete a lot of things in my phone to download good music videos.

ANH: girls should not get caught with porn in their phone anyway!

CONAN: social network LinkedIn wants to become the facebook for work. there's already a facebook for work, it's called... FACEBOOK!  

140225

wait, "Jimmy Fallon to host The Tonight Show"? you mean to tell me that unfunny LENO is OFF the air?!

140226

Len - Steal My Sunshine

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haa didn't know this feel-good song had a video! LIKE LIKE 

OC peeps hardly drive up to hang out in LA cuz we find it to be a CHORE! haa "the OC curtain".

140227

Coeur de Pirate - Adieu

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"je t'aimais mais je t'assure que c'est la fin."

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Beatrice Martin's voice is unparalleled

i absolutely miss listening to french being spoken. i feel right at home. so nostalgic... 

140228

no, i don't fear the rain; it's weak californian drivers in it! drifting is not that difficult, people!